Do You Hear What I Hear?

Listening intently to the way we communicate is what I do for a living. As a teacher/trainer/coach, mindfulness is a critical part of my makeup, besides being extremely fascinating in everyday life!

Anyone can learn to be mindful of others if they really want to make desirable connections. Actually, for some, it's a necessary art to appreciate. Whether you want a new job, increase sales, a new relationship, or accomplish a goal, your best route is to gain support, understanding, and be in harmony with the people around you.

Start Here: Make today a day where you will say very little. That's right, in order to really listen to other people, you have to train yourself not to comment immediately so you can truly take things in.

Be Present
Be Mindful
Be Conscientious

Why? That's the only way to learn and connect with the person that's talking to you. Most importantly, because they subconsciously pick up your energy, you'll get to know yourself better. There's just no better way to live with intent, achieve success and to simply find fulfillment in your life.

We're all on our own journeys, but we can't get there without stress, struggle or pain if we don't have the help of those around us. Family, friends, colleagues... they're all important in helping you get where you want to be.

Notice your enthusiasm, joy, and positive energy bouncing back to you from those you talk to regularly? No? Breathe deeply. Say little. Create the emotion you want to receive. Then, write to me because I'd love to hear of your discoveries!

That's Not What I Meant

Recent findings in neuroscience have discovered our brain's capacity to record the actions of others by merely witnessing those actions. Dr. Pier Ferrari, an Entologist and Neuroscientist, presented to our group of hypnotherapists, dance therapists, and body psychotherapists, a fascinating workshop on his studies of Mirror Neurons. We discussed the communal process of understanding and empathy and the possibility that this may come from a much deeper place within us than previously imagined. Because Dr. Ferrari's studies were done on newborn monkeys, we assume that the variability of intensity of mirror neurons have something to do with development in the womb. I think this phenomenon occurs way beyond that... perhaps at conception? Past life maybe? That's a different topic altogether, and I doubt science will take that on in my lifetime, but I digress.

Copycats
When you're in a group setting, focus your attention on someone nearby, anyone... and just wait. Within a few minutes notice yourself "mirroring" them (or vice versa)by way of positioning your body like them, or showing a certain mannerism (talking w/hands; a look). We can intellectually understand the importance of body language in communication, but when tested, we immediately get the sense that we may have more influence on others' behaviour than previously imagined.

Are you aware of just how powerful you truly are? Most of us are not, and that can cause big problems. This is where Mindfulness comes in.

Communication is a Physical Act
Ever notice when someone's mannerism looks just like those of members of their family, like parents and siblings, or even a very close friend? Notice it in your own family? In my observation (and because I study movement), I've noticed that we clearly inherit our posture and body language from close family members and/or friends. We do this on a deeper, more primal level in an effort to understand each other (like macaque monkeys). However, I don't believe it stops there. The emotions we feel (and try to hide) also come through our bodies in movement and all forms of communication. Now if the people close to you are recording your information, will they behave and move like you or in response to a certain part of you? In a word, yes, and they'll respond to emotions that are perhaps not yet obvious to you, but certainly expressed by you.

I didn't mean that!
Misunderstandings create frustration and stress. I see people all the time who do not express their true intentions (from the heart), not because they don't feel like it, but because they just don't know how. They are simply not yet aware of their own power to create the life they want.

How do we match our intention with our actions? Hypnosis, imagery, and meditation work very well as tools to help develop mindfulness... not to change the person, just the way the person communicates. Actually, those practices bring out the true person by helping them speak from their hearts.

Once you become aware that your intentions are matching your actions, you'll realize your own influence in any given situation. Oh, and please use your power for good.

REPOST from 6/22/08 www.notaboutfood.com